Small and Insignificant

It irks me- the dust.

How it unassumingly intrudes.

Slowly, gradually, at an old wives’ pace.

 It takes days; maybe even hours,

To leave their fragile mark.

 

What once was yours; usurped,

Without any resistance.

That freckled white snow is everywhere,

On my clothes, in the air, and even-

On the reflected me I see in the mirror.

 

Days go by…

I’m surrounded,

Everything looks the same,

But nothing truly stays that way,

That leaves me but one choice.

 

I cleaned.

I swept, I dusted, I vacuumed,

I sweat, I hungered, I persevered,

Slowly, gradually, at an old wives’ pace,

I reclaimed everything.

 

I needed to clean.

Because you see…

My mom, she’s like dust.

The Homo Sapien race is an irksome one. If there was one god that we all serve, that would be the God of Familiarity. I don’t know what it is, but there’s something remotely pleasant about a routine. I know I know, we need to break out once in a while, but for 95% of the time, we seek solace in the commonplace. 

I have a fear against looking stupid. I think that’s the purpose of my life; to get from birth to death without enduring stupidity. Whoever’s reading this, let that be a hint that I want that on my tombstone.

Min Nadzri 1986-????

A great person who goes through life looking smart.

Oooohhh, there’s a lot of instances where one can stumble into a situation where one comes off like a complete jackass. But handling a new scenario where we break out from the norm is probably the gateway to hell itself. More so when you are in this country.

I hate my accent.

No, hate is the wrong word. I despise my accent. Stupid complicated incomprehensible Malaysian mix with god knows what morphing into heaven knows what.

Something happened this morning which I dare not reveal. It’s just so terribly humiliating. It was a mix of a new scenario, the nonsense that I spew, a dash of not wanting to look stupid and a hint of pretending to understand what the other person was saying inevitably leads to a bubbling cauldron simmering with a recipe for disaster.

Suffice to say, there’s no mound on earth that can bear my shameful face.

Arghhh!!! 

Ahh, Tired. Just changed to a new PBL group. Anyway, needed to show off PS skill to new group, hence...